As a child I was at once scared of this man and in awe of him. In both cases my perceptions of him were valid as he could be abusive in one second and awe inspiring the next. Mostly I remember him as playful, so I am OK today. I may be in some denial as well, but that is OK too.
As a young adult I had many issues with the man, as did he with me. In retrospect we were on solid ground in our estimations of the other. We were each ego centric and inconsiderate of the other. Our egocentricity resulted in our inconsiderate behavior towards other folks as well. We might have been mirror images in many ways.
As a middle aged man I was again a dependent of this man. We continued to struggle in our own lives but were now open to each others views and were more concerned for the other than ourselves. We were again happy and playful with each other.
As a mature man I am without him but try to live up to an ideal that reflects the values I believe he instilled in me.
He has been the greatest influence in my life and I am happy with who I am. By that measure he was a good man and I feel fortunate to call him Daddy.
RIP Dad on your birthday. I love you.